Nov 6 Day 64 on the road. Michael says since I had bad luck on the salt flats maybe he will do just a tour.  I suggest the company I went with and he heads off looking for a tour company and I head to the motorcycle shop only a few blocks from the hotel at 9am.  Get there and typical european fashion the guy says I have to drink coffee before I can start anything so I sit there twiddling my thumbs why this cunt drinks coffee for a hour.  I am sorry but if you cant do shit based off drinking something as ridiculous as coffee there should be fucking rehab for that its sad an pathetic in my eyes.  So if your a druggy I would say your probably doing alright cause you are no better or worst these coffee

Getting Betty Naked

people so carry on with your drugs im sure it takes a lot less time. SOOO after this addict takes 4 dosages of his drug we start on the bike.  He trys to find all possible solutions before going to the gas line.  Which I am sure its not a bad thing but we waste 2hrs till he finally says okay everything looks okay lets check the pump.  Open up the fuel pump and sure as shit the thing is barely spitting out any fuel. So plug that back up to the fuel filter/pressure regulator thingy and look here its not producing enough pressure to push through the regulator.  Take this stuff off the bike clean the fuel filter with gas an blow it through with a air gun while he takes the pump out of the housing.  We then clean that through with gas an blow air through it.  It finally moves better hook it back up still not pushing gas through the regulator.  We go to a local hardware store and buy actually the same pump BOSCH at the store.  Now uyuni is a small dumby town.  Whoever is the governor here must not give to fucks cause its clearly a tourist town it should be a lot more advance than it is so it was a gem that we could actually buy a german part like Bosch here in this town.  We get back to the shop he again needs more of his drug.  So another wasted hour while the cunt sits in the sun sipping his addiction.  Put the pump on we got pressure gas is pushing through.  He then says we should get the injector clean we find out its closed till tomorrow (people in South America and bolivia being the worst only work for a few hours an its at there time they choose to work not mad about it good for them but frustrating when your not use to that). I go back to my hotel Michael is there we head for dinner he tells me about his tour. He paid a third of what I paid and he got to go see mummies.  I was already a bit bum I paid 6o dollars for a tour I could take myself on which the only thing I got out of it was a few photos and a video the tour guide suggested but I missed out human and animal mummies and they were not mummified its was a real human preserved I guess from the dryness of the flats so the skin was just dry to the bone.  It looked fucking awesome cause thats the shit I like but no we went to a salt factory that there were no actual factory or workers making salt just a guy showing us he bags the shit up.  Anyways we get some drinks again and call it a night after the hotel complaining we were to loud even though there was no guest staying in rooms on either side of us.  Day 65 get back to the shop at 9am and what do you know the fucking Junkie says let me just get my coffee in quick.  Like what the fuck you told me to be here at 9 why the fuck

while ordering food this little shit jump on my chair behind me

cant you suck down the liquid tar before I get here.  Anyways another wasted hour but we finally go to the fuel injector cleaning place they said come back at 12.  We come back at 12 they said no one were on lunch. Fucking hell so we get lunch and head back there at 1 and the fuckers didnt even clean it they welcome us into there business we go upstairs into there house they have a room were the injector cleaning thing is its clean within 10mins and were out of there.  Now why the hell could they not of done that I dont know but damn that life must be good.  So head back to his shop throw the injector shits working fuck boy gets more of his black cock cream but im tired of waiting for his ass to sip on his drug so I put the bike all back together and boom Betty starts right up.  Head back to the hotel check out and these fucks want to charge me for towels that are dirty.  Really bitch so clean the damn things then thats your job not mine I dont work here.  They say there ruined I said yeah whatever they say you need to leave something here got get money and pay us 30 for 3 towerls one big one and two small ones.  The two

Michael and I packing up

small ones are dirty probably from the mud from the salt flats the big one is covered in red shit looks like hair dye.  I am like fuck no this is not my towel if it looked liked these 2 yeah.  So i say okay I leave my OLD tires here but I am taking these towels if I am paying for them so I go to the atm and get you money I load the bike up pay the cunt Robin 200 more dollars for working on my bike ((which come to find out 300 is the avg monthly income in Uyuni so he fucking raped me again) was going to the atm but then thought the hotel is 50 a night you want me to pay 30 for towels fuck off I never went back to the hotel and Michael and I head 2 and half hours to Chile.  Bike was running great till about 30 miles outside of the border my bike just shuts off out of nowhere.  Thinking you go to be kidding I try to start it again and again nothing is going on.  I dont want to hold Michael up so I said just go on without me man Ill figure something out.  So I am now stranded in the middle of nowhere in the desert this time not the salt flats.  Not sure what is better or worst but I take off the seat an check my fuel pump.  Pull off a hose to the pump turn the key an nothing is coming out.  Its the fucking pump again a brand new only 2 hours old. I pull the pump out and yeah sure as shit its not making no noise.  So I am fucked I put the shit back together a truck passes by he stops.  It was some old timer from a village near by I am guessin his teeth were all rotten and spoke no english and didnt seem to want to tow me into town.  As I am talking to the old timer a 4×4 passes in the opposite direction heading back to uyuni and he stops.  I am currently on a desolate dirt road so I guess people are more available to help knowing there is nothing around.  The guy in the 4×4 is a tour guide he speaks a little english and helps me diagnose my bike says it might be electrical.  We fiddle with some plugs he checks my fuses everything seemed okay about a hour later a pickup truck coming the direction I am heading is pulling up I wave him down.  It was a couple from chile the driver doesnt speak english but his wife speaks a little as well so I ask if they can take me into the next town. They asked were I am heading I say chile they said we take you to chile.  After about 5mins we got betty sitting in the back of there pick up truck.  We strap her down with the only 2 tie downs I have and secure my boxes.  I hop in the extended cab of there truck and here I am on my way to Chile with 2 strangers.  The wife asked were do I go I said I dont know just to chile is fine.  She says we go to Calama is that okay.  I said yes Calama is where Michael and I were heading originally so that works out.  So we get to the border of Chile there is Michael we laugh about the odds of that happening so fast he says he is just staying here at the border for the night as it was getting dark so the wind sucked and the road sucked.  I hop back in the Chilean truck and 3hrs they drive me to Calama.  They take me to a hotel only one block from 2

just walking around Calama

motorcycle shops.  They asked for no money and were very happy to help me but I asked them if they could take me to cajero automatico (ATM) (because i have no chilean dollars) after we unloaded my motorcycle at the hotel.  We drive to a atm close by I have them 50 chileans like 80 dollars for helping me.  I thank them as much as I possibly can and off they go and here my ass sits in a hotel in chile ha.  Day 66 was a sunday so of course the motorcycle shopis closed.  I look up things to do in Calama and there is nothing even semi  close everything is day trips that leaves the town.  So just walk around an sit in my hotel all day. Day 67 get up at 9am walk to the corner were the motorcycle shops are and of course there closed.. Thinking what the fuck go back to my hotel sit around. Walk back down there at 1030 an there just now opening up.  I try to explain to them my motorcycle is broke they call a local guy to help translate. The guys name is Cali ironically so he comes down and he translates.  We go back to my hotel push my bike to the shop and they start by checking the fuses as well.  Pull the pump out

bullshit pump

and say you need a new pump its done.  After looking at the pump I realize its practically black from corrosion or just a knock off part or something.  They say there is a mechanics shop down the street they will have pumps there.  Cali and I walk to the shop where we talk come to find out he lived in houston for 19yrs where is son and x wife still live.  He came back to Chile after he got divoreced.  Anyways we get to the shop get a pump they had two I asked if it was Bosch (thats what bmw motorcycles use) they said no its Japanese you dont want anything german there like fairies I laugh cause I have no idea what that means but im guessing he meansthere sensitive.  We get back to the shop around one they say come back at 8 before we close cause they have a 2hr lunch break now.  I come back at 8 they said not good. Come back tomorrow around noon should be okay. Day 68 get to the shop early they said its the fuel filter/pressure regulator

Betty getting all protected.

and fuel injector you need them replaced.  Come back at 4 after there lunch the boss can call down to santiago to get prices on the pieces.  So I rebook the hotel yet again and come back at 4 well boss man didnt call down but I think to myself fuck it if santiago is only 16hrs away I should just rent a truck an drive my bike down there and have them fix it.  I tell Cali what I am thinking he says there is a shipping company lets see how much is it to ship your bike.  We go and its at 5 so of course the place is closed.  He says we will look first thing and then you can decide on what you want to do drive or have it shipped. Day 69 at 9am head to the shipping company they said sure we can ship it out tomorrow it will arrive monday.  Fuck monday but after I do the math figured I wont arrive till fri anyways shop is closed on the weekend It wont get worked on till monday anyways.  So I ask how much they say 80 chileans which is 108 dollars.  So wait let me get this straight it will only cost me 100 fucking dollars to ship a 600pd motorcycle 16 hrs.  I paid 80 dollars to ship my fucking tattoo portfolio from california to australia .  Done deal ship that fucking bike if that all it is cause I was going to pay 325 to rent a truck and plus gas it would probably cost me 500 dollars.  So I grab a bus that leaves at 4 that day for 23 dollars but 21hrs on a bus.  Whatever saves me a night not paying for a hotel so I take the bus and at 415 I am on the bus and off to santiago for 21hrs.